one time i was visiting my sister at college and there was this really hot british kid who was studying abroad and i started making out with him and one thing led to another and we ended up fucking and he was about to cum and i thought it would be really sexy to say “the british are coming” and needless to say he didnt think it was very funny
'oh gross it's dark chocolate i hate dark chocolate' good
give it to me
Reblog if you dont shave your legs everyday.
I just want everyone to see how unrealistic some expectations are.
I haven’t shaved my legs in months and I’m not even ashamed of that.
When i read Panic! at the disco i read it like
at the disco
i hate the phrase “life is short” because life is literally the longest thing that any of us will ever experience
WHY DO PARENTS ALWAYS RUIN YOUR DAY AND THEN ACT LIKE THEY DIDNT RUIN YOUR DAY AND WONDER WHY YOURE IN A BAD MOOD
I swear at least five of my two friends don’t like me
a CEO walks into his office “any messages?” he asks his assistant
“two anons want to know who tom petty is and one just says ‘post your ballsack’”
“got it. check my dashboard”
“that skeleton gif you like is back again”
he rubs his chin pensively “mm. reblog that”
do you ever get those pangs of anxiety where you feel like nobody likes you and nobody will ever like you and you will achieve nothing